Lawnmower Leadership

I recently attended a new student orientation program at the college that my oldest child will be attending this fall. I was impressed with the event, specifically the portion during which they separated the parents from the students. While the students were touring with breakout groups specific to their majors, they provided parent-specific material and expectations.

Sitting there in the lecture hall with other parents going through a similar experience, many of us sending a child off to college for the first time, I listened to the professor describe what to expect in the coming months. There was a portion of the programming during which they encouraged us to reflect on our parenting styles, the examples provided were helicopter and lawnmower parenting. I had heard of helicopter parenting and was sure I hadn’t parented in that style, but lawnmower parenting? I hadn’t heard of it, and instantly became fearful I might have done just that.

Picture this, there’s a large area with high grass, a parent pushing a lawnmower, a child walking easily behind them in the neatly mowed grass path. The parent is doing all of the work, the child walks carelessly and effortlessly along. In a state of personal reflection, I acknowledge that as a parent and leader, I intentionally remove obstacles and attempt to set my children and subordinates up for success. A fellow team member on the executive staff with a similar leadership style likens himself to a bulldozer, leading his team down the road and removing obstacles along the way. What could possibly be wrong with this style? Isn’t this just advocacy and support? Isn’t that what I’m supposed to be doing?

Apparently not. Apparently, people are supposed to struggle a little. They have to experience hardship and challenges, failures and setbacks. It’s in those moments that they learn how to cope and overcome. They learn about innovation and perseverance. They might fall down, stumble, toss about, but they get up stronger. And most importantly, they learn how to get up and try again. We hear this all of the time, as individuals. Don’t give up! Try again! Believe in yourself! How do we practice this in leadership?

I asked my children if I was in-fact a lawnmower parent and they proceeded to laugh and say no. I pressed them a little, “then what kind of parent am I?”. They thought for a moment and then my son said, “maybe a weed-wacker”. He explained, “you get the big stuff out of the way and we know you are there for us, but you make us do most of it ourselves”. I’ll take that, while also making sure I am giving people ample opportunity to clear their own paths to success and personal growth.